The Copper

 

The copper lion

leaves a sun glistening trail of blood through the tall grass.

It's own or another's is irrelevant at this point;

Does he look for a good place to lay down and die?

No, just walks on as he always does,

his wounds always too fresh to heal. 

My Path Was Not Chosen,

Dragged down mine in a straight jacket

Given a virtual world 

to live out for the view of the world.

A child kept from the violence like the young Buddha

Only to discover the suffering of the world

Setting out to stop as much as possible.

A creature who grew wings 

has miracles happening around him.

The weather at his behest.

The Holiest 

understand

 I AM love and peace,

beaten to a crawl,

forced to carry a backbreaking cross thru the streets

battered by the taunts of those I once loved.

 

Today I know all people can unite in one family,

and will when in earth it is as it is in heaven.

Hard to see there from here.

My visions and all I have to believe to carry on

tells me I will follow the science 

not what is politically expedient.

I have always felt alone and isolated.

This was from using the television

Instead of going out among people.

I was embarrassed at the thought

I was Jesus.

I did not live a life for you to follow.

I did not want you to watch and listen to me.

Since this was there I used it first to fight you

I was ignorant.  Barely followed politics

sickened by what I saw.

Now, I know there is some ruling cabal

of some sort or another.

And groups like the one I was with 

my so called family.

Now I have disappeared from mention on the tv I have,

a nice enough relief after all the triggers.

My Youtube feed all of a sudden had It's All In My Mind

and a lyle lovette song to the effect.

I will NEVER forget.

I will try to forgive.

I will never be more deadly than I am now.

Your blind spots are filled with your doom,

Ready to bring light to your darkness.

The Hand of God is mine.

The deadly rages he fills me with seem of the past.

Yet I see old allies and know by any means necessary could come.

I who wish to use the lawful means to deal with this

Putting no more officers in danger

Over the actions of Billionaires.

I am on the far left

This does not seem to jibe with my work with the Police;

I feel for all people and see into the minds of many 

-- or try.  

Dark places.

I believe the police

and the community

can solve problems.

I mostly know in twenty years,

we will need Guardians,

devoted to keeping Morality alive.

Not allowing the narrative of ethics

to be molded into the the perversions of their cult leader.

I will move through churches as holy water

whatever denomination I am in I will be

temple, mosque, cathedral, ashram

taking what is universal

into my stream

of attempts at wisdom

I have been choosing my words peaceably.

I once wanted a revolution, 

Purely out of being pissed,

at being brainwashed and ignored.,

I thought I would be approached

This shit explained.

I was making jokes

And you wanted to have a summer of Jesus.

I cheered on armies just because you said they were on my side.

Meaning I was out of danger.

I had no idea what the ramifications were.

Now, here we are...

Not exactly a Jesus here.

I was not raised with the humble dignity of a carpenter

I was not raised religious enough for it to matter much

I was raised to do what I did, 

one way of seeing this...

which I find a cop out.

Lord, in this time of troubles

As in the Holy Land your people are starved to death

And no army can respond.

I pray to you for Peace on this land.

I pray that the open society we were moving toward

will become all the more urgent under Trump.

Democracy precious enough to reform the present crew.

       I noticed the Pope was chosen based on a tack placed in a Globe.   You see God working through me on the highest levels.  I did not expect it last time, or this time.  You almost chose our dear Cardinal.  He would have certainly been historic.  Well, he is. The one who communicates with the wild 'angel.'  I have learned much from him about the scripture.  I am in a phase right now where I know I am too ignorant to think of violence;  my mind simply will not allow it.  This is strange.  Like when in meditation I go for blankness and ignore the thoughts, but these cause more an anxiety, a feeling like I ... am panicking..  and the thought I am having ends before violence.

For many years I have been playing a character at times.  I am brave, but to think Machismo shows this is ridiculous.  I can remember vaguely trying to break this.  I see my words echoed by the radicals, the madness, the ability to believe any lie.  

I have quit lying now.  I feel naked.  Not in your sense.  Yes, I will follow your rules, if they do not impede my spiritual quest to somehow or another save souls, and lives.  I am here in your endtimes, not when the screaming and pain is too late to heal, but now when many things can be done to change the plight of some....  and balance the zealotry of Christians, and all religions, temper their hatreds with the love of God.  How empty the money hoarders in soul...  

I am 63 now and my story is certainly not over.  I do not know what is going to happen of course, but we will see.

My bravery is shown when I prove I would rather die than be involved in a race war.  We are in a class war, and any division of our forces is a problem.  I hate calling this a war.  It is more an infection of billionaires, hoarding some vital mineral, and it will be dealt with easily, or with great difficulty.  I tried to take from the rich and give to the poor.  I have little memory of what I did, or said.  I remember some of the pain I caused you.  The horrors.  I tried to protect the country, and clear my name. 

When you show me something if I do not believe you, that means quite often I know nothing about this.  I did not want orange to have anything to do with the other.  Given a car, again.  I told you I did not want a car.  I do not know what you were celebrating with Orange.  I thought it meant you were doing good things, but I was still an idiot about the race situation.  I believe in a form of history that requires seeing events from all sides.  Stand Point Theory.   This also says people in ghettos know how to fix their problems better than millionaires in Washington, DC.  

I do not want a color anymore.  Too much like churches, they come with a lot of fine print I do not agree with.  I think.  Maybe I am wrong?  If the left is yellow, then that I am.  If my 'family' is white regardless of their beliefs, I believe they are better off having a peacemaker in charge, or as a hostage.  You responded when I asked.  I thank you very much for the meow mix.  Does this bring me enemies?  If I am going to be hated for being moral, then fine.  I acted prior to this, and maybe all during this, after being brainwashed, and having my reality go insane.  The tv talking to me.

I think often of the beginning.  The car crashes.  I was still a million miles away from thinking my comedy had been taken too seriously.  My sorrow over such events is a cloud I live in, and a penitence I  deserve. These are the thoughts making up the quicksand that tries to suck me down... under the ground, sand filling my gasping lungs...  until lack of air turns off the conscious mind.